I hate fucking stupid people! No seriously…
Guy walks into my video store where we’re liquidating our inventory. We’re selling all the VHS tapes for $2.00 each which is what he’s interested in. He starts looking around. This guy’s been in here many times before, he’s just annoying as hell. Young guy, but he always calls first to tell me he’s coming down after he asks a bunch of inane questions, then he shows up 3 to 4 minutes later (he must live very near by) and then when he leaves, he literally calls again when he gets home to tell me he’ll be bringing the movies back later. I know right? He’s just a complete dolt. An ultra maroon as Bugs Bunny would say. So after taking this treatment for like a year from this clod, I decided it was gonna be my mission to fuck with him every chance I got, but not outside the boundaries of common sense. So here was today’s verbal transaction…
Idiot: So are the tapes tax included or just $2.00 even.
Me: Neither.
What?
You asked me if the tapes were including tax OR $2.00 even, it’s neither one of those.
What?
The $2.00 does not include tax AND the price is not $2.00 even.
{BLANK STARE} Wha… What?
I’m just answering your question sir.
So how much are the tapes?
I just answered that.
So $2.00 then.
Right, tax not included.
What?
—
I could have kept this conversation going for 30 minutes if I had the desire for it, but my apathy got the best of me so I decided to put and end to it, “Two dollars PLUS tax!”
Then he ACTUALLY SAID, “Each?”
No you fucking imbecile, $2.00 for the whole store. You no what? Forget the tax, just go get your truck and come in here and empty this fuckin’ place out so I don’t ever have to talk to the dregs of humanity again. Now GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE!
OK, the last part only happened in my head. But the rest is true.
I HATE (well, hate is a pretty strong word…) HATE!!! stupid people. Die already. Or at least kill me.
I love being a misanthropic, apathetic sociopath. Fuck these people!
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Comments
Stupid people are the reason I have a comedy act.
Me too.
I dont get it. Are they all taxed or not….seriously, I share your pain and hope this guy falls on a sharp stick.
Sharp stick. Maybe I’ll have one just lyin’ around for him.
oh you hate stupid people. I read it as you dislike putting your dick in stupid people.
No i’ll put my dick in a dumb girl, but I like smart better.
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